Just Love Them

MOTHER’S DAY 2020

LOVING YOU BOTH WAS THE EASY PART.  THAT FEELING OF LOVE-

OH MY CHILDREN, SUCH AN EASY FEELING.

DID YOU KNOW THAT EVERY TIME I CHANGED A POOPIE DIAPER I KNEW I LOVED YOU.

DID YOU KNOW THAT EVERY TIME I RAN TO YOUR CRIB WITH NO SLEEP-

I LOVED YOU.

DID YOU KNOW THAT EVERY TIME I HELD YOU TO MY BREAST –

I LOVED YOU.

DID YOU KNOW THAT EVERY TIME I YELLED WHEN I SHOULD’T HAVE-

I LOVED YOU.

DID YOU KNOW THAT I WAS STILL

TRYING TO FIGURE IT ALL OUT?

DID YOU KNOW WHEN I APOLOGIZED FOR MY SHORTCOMINGS-

I WAS SAYING, “I LOVE YOU.”

DID YOU KNOW THAT LOVING YOU WAS THE EASY PART?

DID YOU KNOW THAT I THOUGHT MY LOVE WOULD BE ENOUGH?

LOVE THEM. AND, I DID.  I DO.

AND THEN, I REMEMBERED THIS…

JUST LOVE THEM

THE DAY WE BROUGHT YOU 

HOME FROM THE HOSPITAL

I CRIED-

WHAT DO I DO WITH HER?

LOVE HER-

AND I DID.

I DO

FIVE YEARS LATER WE BROUGHT YOU

HOME TO MEET YOUR BIG SISTER.

I CRIED-

WHAT DO I DO WITH HIM?

WHAT DO I DO WITH THEM?

LOVE HIM-

LOVE THEM-

AND I DID.

I DO—

LOVE, MOM

On Tasting Grief

 

My grief made me vomit sobs.

The pain was not palatable.

Repulsive pain.
The kind of pain that will make you hate.
Bitter.
That sick taste.
My grief made me vomit sobs.
Like a virus that lingers.
Cast out this substance.
Still shaky on my feet.
Time is what it takes to swallow life again.